They say truth is in the eye of the beholder, but what if you don’t like what you see? Changing perspectives helps you realize there’s another path, another way through whatever challenges you face. It doesn’t mean certain things aren’t true, but it can mean you have more options than you thought.
Want to know a few methods that work for changing perspectives?
Let’s go.
Is Your Reality Your Truth?
Changing perspectives isn’t about making two plus two equal five. It’s about making personal reality statements shift.
I’m never getting out of this debt.
I’m stuck in this job.
My wife hates how I do everything.
I can’t lose weight to save my life.
Personal reality isn’t always the truth. You may be stuck in debt, with a job you don’t like, hear complaints from your spouse, or have trouble losing weight. Those things might be true for you at the moment, but you don’t have to stay there forever.
Opinions or personal reality statements can be misleading. Just because you feel a certain way about a current situation does not mean there is no other option for you or that no other reality can exist. Emotions in general can be misleading, but feelings are not facts.
When you find yourself in such positions, it’s time to change your perspective. This is done, believe it or not, by exploring that feeling or that personal reality statement more deeply.
Changing Perspectives
Before we get into the how, let’s solidify the why. It doesn’t make sense to go through a process if you’re not convinced it’s worth the trouble.
Changing perspectives offers many benefits. You find new paths you hadn’t thought of before. Your thoughts and feelings on a matter, person, or situation change with better understanding. New ideas lead to new insights (and vice versa) which opens the doors to new possibilities.
What if there were a way out of debt you could accomplish. What if you either found career happiness right where you are or there was a way to change careers you didn’t think of until now. Maybe there’s more to the situation with your spouse than you realized and you find the path to better communication and healing.
If it’s possible to not feel miserable, it’s worth trying. So, let’s get to those methods and see what’s possible.
3 Methods that Work on Changing Perspectives
To keep it simple, we’ll use the same examples. Most people can relate to at least one of them or can find similarities with their own personal reality statements. Let’s use some coaching to work on changing perspectives.
Method 1: Examining the Truth without Emotions
Debt is crushing and personal. It draws negative emotions when you feel you can’t provide for yourself or your family. Emotions can cloud judgment and lead to self talk. As such, it’s easy to feel terrible when faced with debt—and the economy doesn’t help. But there is a path out once you examine the truth without emotional fog.
Coaching Partner (CP): I’m never getting out of this debt. I’m a lousy provider and I’m taking my family down with me.
Coach: What makes you say that?
CP: I work all kinds of extra shifts and never get to see the kids, but for all the overtime, I’m still not getting ahead.
Coach: What have you done to work on this?
CP: I try to pay all the bills, but I’m stuck on the minimum payments and end up owing more on interest. I tried ignoring a few to catch up on others, but now I’m in collections with those. I can’t win.
Coach: What haven’t you tried?
CP: I don’t know. I’m no good at this. … I guess, I guess I could suck it up and talk to someone for help.
Coach: Who will you ask?
CP: A coworker recommended a place that got him out of a tough spot. He said it wasn’t expensive. I don’t want to owe more, but I think if it means getting to a better place financially, it’ll be worth it.
Coach: When will you ask?
CP: I took an extra shift this weekend and I was going to make it a double. I don’t think I’ll have time…
Coach: You said earlier this is the biggest weight in your life right now.
CP: It is. I suppose I could just take the one extra shift and make it a priority to see that guy. The consultation is free, then I could go to my kid’s game after.
Coach: I can’t wait to hear how it goes.
Method 2: Considering Another’s Point of View
Walking in someone else’s shoes helps you consider what things look like to that person. Again, emotions need to be set aside for this to work, but understanding another’s point of view is a proven way to change perspectives.
CP: My wife hates everything I do. I can’t win.
Coach: Go on.
CP: I get home from work, dump my stuff, and just want to eat dinner and go to bed. My job is stressful. She wants me to put everything away, help with homework, drive to soccer… I just need to relax. She’s the one who’s home all day.
Coach: Sounds like you want to decompress after a difficult day. Can we try something? Walk through her day and if you’re able to find where this is coming from.
CP: She’s just home. She works from home in the morning, but she’s done by one.
Coach: And then…
CP: She cleans and preps dinner. She has to get the kids. She’s been helping her mom take care of her dad some days. The other day, she changed over the shoe rack from flip flops to boots and cleaned the whole area up… I–actually I dumped my shoes there and left a mess. She’s stressed about her dad’s health. I bet I didn’t help with that.
Coach: What could you do?
CP: I need to apologize. Seems we’re both stressed. Maybe if we talk, we can find a better way to understand each other.
Coach: That sounds great.
Method 3: Refocusing or Realigning Your Goals
It’s easy to lose sight of your original goals when you’re in the thick of it. Refocusing goals can bring you back to your original intent. From there, you may see another path.
CP: I’m giving up on the diet. I can’t lose weight to save my life.
Coach: A few weeks ago, you said you were worried about your cardiac health and made a goal to eat better and get fit. What changed?
CP: Every time we go out, my friends order beers and chips and I end up eating junk. I haven’t had time for the gym and healthy food is too expensive.
Coach: Do you remember your motivator for losing weight?
CP: Yes… my dad’s recent heart attack and my recent high cholesterol reading.
Coach: Is your health still something you want to improve?
CP: It is.
Coach: Let’s start with the diet. What changes can you make to help improve your situation and move closer to that weight loss goal?
CP: I guess I don’t have to eat the chips. I could order a salad, and maybe I should cut back on the beers, but I still want one. Also, I don’t need to buy as many snacks to have at home. I eat what’s there.
Coach: Those are good plans. What about exercise?
CP: Honestly, we went out four times last week. It was a little excessive. I could skip a few outings and hit the gym. Also, I don’t use the stairs as much, so I’ll start doing that.
Coach: When will you make these changes?
CP: Today. I can do them today.
Seeing a New Path
Changing perspectives means forging new roads ahead to more ideas, better understanding, and greater possibilities. Your goals become not only clearer, but more attainable. So, if you feel stuck, let’s talk about changing perspectives and navigating to a brighter future. Reach out today.